I think Skyblock, at its core, is the ultimate challenge in resource management. You spawn on a tiny island in an empty universe. All you have is a tree, some supplies, and some dirt to stand on. You have to treasure every dirt block, because if one falls into the void, there's no way to replace it. And as you carefully navigate your absurd circumstance, you gain a new appreciation for the few things you have as you meticulously use them to their fullest effect. With nothing but some ice, lava, and saplings, you slowly transform this empty expanse into a world of your very own. Skyblock teaches us that, no matter how ridiculous the odds may seem, within us resides the power to overcome these challenges and achieve something beautiful---that one day, we'll look back at where we started and be amazed by how far we've come.

So Hypixel recently released their own unique take on the Skyblock genre. So basically you spawn on your own island, you cut down a tree, you bridge over to the other island, and then you log into Wynncraft.

In a nutshell, Hypixel Skyblock is exactly like regular Skyblock, the only minor difference being that, instead of carefully using your minimal items, you immediately get access to a separate multiplayer world with an infinite amount of every conceivable resource, and then you spend all your time in that world instead of the sky. But besides that, classic Skyblock.

Oh, cool! They transferred my stats from real life!

Wheat, wheat, wheat, wheat, wheat, wheat, wheat, wheat, wheeeeeeeeat, wheeeeeeeeeeeat, hey, hey! Stop taking my wheat!

Oh my God no, no the nons, they've taken all the wheat! We're gonna have a famine!

Wait, why're we all fighting over food, there's no hunger in this game. Food... food literally does not matter. What're we doing with our lives?

A little, uh, pro tip here on how to be an expert at Skyblock: if you put your coins in the bank you can get 2% interest on your coins at the end of every Minecraft season, which is a very useful unit of measurement because I know exactly how long a Minecraft season is in real life.

Oh good, there's some more info here: a Minecraft season is 93 Minecraft days. Thank you Hypixel, very cool.

We got my boy Jacob here, he mines cobblestone for me all day, I, uh, I don't pay him, and he also has no rights.

"Uh, but Technoblade, doesn't that kinda sound like--"

Shhhh... I need cobblestone.

Ok, look, ain't nobody care about farming, fishing, or cutting down trees, let's go get some diamonds.

Bum ba-dum bum, bum BUM ba-du bum, wait a minute. This is just a prison server.

The Blacksmith said he'd do me a favor and reforge one of my items for only ten coal, aaaand he put negative five intelligence on it. Thank you Hypixel, very cool.

It's alright, as someone that went to college, I know that you can't lose what you never had... but you can go into debt.

After an arduous five minutes of mining, I finally made it here: the Deep Caverns, the final challenge in mining.

There's six floors in the Deep Caverns, each floor containing more valuable ores than the last, but each floor is, in turn, guarded by even more powerful monsters. But I mean that's just some blue zombie, I've got like full iron armor, so I don't see how I could possibly--

They can shoot laser beams out of their faaaace!

Thank you Hypixel.

Finally, the Pigman's Den, at last I have found my people.

Pigmen don't attack you unless you attack them first, so we should be safe to mine restoH OH MY GOD WHY. WHY. WHAT IS-- WHAT IS THAT? WHY DOES HE HAVE FIRE MAGIC? WHY DO THE PIGMEN HAVE FIRE MAGIC??

...I don't like this game.

Look, if I'm gonna get immediately obliterated by magic monsters, I ain't gonna die mining redstone, I'm gonna die mining diamonds, let's go further.

Don't mind meee, I am a pig like you-- nononononono, urh, nonononono, nope, mrmmm... oh God, they cASTED THE MAGIC!

NononononononoNOnonono, no, oh okay, we're at- we're at the Slime Hill. We've gone past their territory, they can't-- okay well, that can attack us.

Bunch of idiot slimes think they can-- ok, I'm going the other way actually.

Where- where's the stairs down? Gonna, OW, just gonna, AHHHH--Nope, nope, we're gonna mind our own business and go in this direction.

C'mon, where, where're the, where're the stairs down at? Where're they at?

It was at this moment that Technoblade knew... he messed up.

AHHh.

Oup, here we go! So long losers!

I know what you're thinking: diamonds, we did it, wrong. We can go further.

There's even better stuff yet, where is it? Where're they-- nope, nope. No thanks. Mrmmmm. Mrrmmm.

Where're the stairs down?

That's the stairs back up, that is the opposite of what I want, nope. Noo!

When the game first came out, they'd make you do a walk of shame every time you died: back to the Hub Island, run past the Blacksmith, into the Coal Mines, warp to the Gold Mine, walk through the Gold Mine, get to the Deep Caverns, walk down to the Lift Operator...

Ugh, oh, we're finally here... son of a---

...Thank you Hypixel.

That's it, I'm tired of getting obliterated by every monster in one hit, it's time for an upgrade. You don't even wanna know how many zombies died to get this armor. Not even that many, I got three of the four pieces from other people, I was unnicked, ok? I, it wasn't even because I was a YouTuber, Skyblock players are just the nicest people on the planet.

And I got three repeat pieces anyway, so it didn't even matter, but I got to pay it forward at least.

Come back, I'm trying to give you free stuff. I'm-I'm tryin-I'm-y-you only need one more! No, take-take, here you go! Merry Christmas, young man.

Ah, look at him. He's a beautiful boy.

I, I was, uh, he- he dropped his sword!

i gotchu fam

I went to give him items and, and then I, and then I ended up robbing him by accident.

Oup, here he is. Trade. Aaaand I'm gonna die. I'm dying for my good deeds. This is what I deserve, this is what I get for being a nice person. Aaand... I live! Half a heart! The spirit of Christmas protects me.

By putting on this armor, my health and defense increase by 50%! But it's not enough. To the Blacksmith!

Prot IV, prot IV, prot IV, prot V... wait what?

With this much armor, I'd like to see a zombie even try to hurt me...

Thank you Hypixel.

Well, I guess dying in two hits is better than dying in one hit-- nope, no, no.

Is this it? Is this-- yes! Yes, we found it! The staircase to the bottom floor, we did it! Yes! And now the zombies are enchanted! But we can get diamond blocks, yes! OHH--

Almost went back to getting one-hit killed again, I don't like this at all.

Must... take as many diamond blocks as possible before I die...

I just, I just want the diamond blocks, they're everywhere! What is this?

Y'know, I'm tired of getting rekt by diamond zombies and skeletons, okay? But if we're gonna do it, we're gonna need the right tools for the job... do I hear level 50 enchant?

I know what you're thinking, level 50 enchant? But you can only go up to 30, wrong. Welcome to Skyblock.

Heh, heh, heh, heh, hehhh, that's not even that strong of a sword.

Alright, we threw that sword away and got one that wasn't garbage. Let's do this.

Y'know, some people say, "What is dead may never die..." but those guys are a bunch of idiots!

Ha, ha haa, die, die, DIE, ah ha ha ha! You clowns still think you can face me? You guys might kill me in two hits, but I can kill you in one!

Finally, after killing thousands of the diamond undead...

Oh my God, I actually got it!

...I finally gathered all the pieces, I finally assembled the Miner Set, when we're underground, the Miner Set gives almost 3 times as much defense as diamond armor, and when it's not worn underground, it's like completely worthless, but I mean, it's Skyblock! Wha- where else are we gonna by, the sky? Didn't think so.

Let's get this armor on. Hoh hoh hohh, yes, that's what I like to see. I'd like to see those diamond zombies do damage to me now-- aaand nothing has changed!

There's only one way to solve this: more level 50 enchants!

Growth, growth, growth...

Y'all messed up now, hoh hoh hoh, it's not enough. To the Blacksmith!

Yes, mhmm, gimmie dat, thaaank you...

Hey guys, it's me, I'm back! No hard feelings about the whole genocide earlier, right? Yeah, we're good.

Hey, I'm- I'm gonna go AFK here and get a glass of water, you gu- you guys don't bully me or anything though.

...

I'm back, got my water. Oh, all those guys left. Oh, well.

Y'know, this isn't satisfying enough. We have to automate it.

One skeleton minion... two skeleton minions... three skeleton minions... four skeleton minions...

Get the water all set up... and one last one here...

Deploy the skeleton minions... why is there ice there, there's not suppose to be ice. No, no my plans... outta here.

Aaaand now I escape before any of that happens. Mhm... hah, hah, hah, hah, ha...

As days go by, I continue killing skeletons. I kill them, I wait, and then I kill them again. I don't leave my island anymore, I don't go on any adventures. I just wait, and then I kill skeletons. Is this really what I wanted to do with my life? Stare at my monitor until meaningless numbers increase? Am I enjoying this? When I first made this grinder, I thought that I was trapping the skeletons, but now I realize, I was only trapping myself.

Oh hey, level 50!